Men...

I just read in a magazine that a male praying mantis can't mate with his head still attached. So the female (bless her little heart) does him the favor of ripping it off first. I also heard somewhere that a cockroach can live for several days with it's head torn off. I guess, if you could get a cockroach and a praying mantis together, it might be a long and meaningful relationship.
After lenghty discussions with friends (or dissections, if you will) of our individual love lifes - or rather, lack of such - I have come to the conclusion that this pretty much sums up my whole problem with men.
My relationships, much like the connections between a male and female praying mantis, are pretty much over before they even begin, although there have been exeptions to this rule, as well. I just thought I'd mention, by the by, that I do not tear their heads off. Granted, men can at times irritate you so badly that you might want to tear their heads off (both of'em), but sane people (Yes, I am, dammit!) can usually restrain themselves. Generally, I'm just no more interested in the guys who seriously fall for me, than a praying mantis would be in a cockroach.
Just for the hell of it, I actually buried my lovelife in the garden this summer. I gave it a tiny little tombstone, and everything. The neighbour might have looked at me funny, but they're really weird, so who cares? Now, if I could only fall in love with a nice, stable cockroach, I could dig it back up again:)